When you go through a divorce, mediation is an optional process you can opt for if you want to settle things without the court’s interference. A skilled mediator listens to both sides of the problem, understands what each party needs, and suggests the best course of action. However, in the end, you and your spouse get to make the final decision, not the mediator.
Not all mediation processes are successful, though. You can go through several sessions of mediation and end up with no solution. The key is to find the right person with the right qualities. A lawyer from Turco Legal can help you spot a good mediator and represent you in your divorce.
Qualities to look for in a mediator
The key to understanding both the parties and suggesting a solution that works for the best interests of both of them is being objective throughout the process. A good mediator does not allow himself/herself to become emotionally involved with either party and the outcome of the process. Divorce conflicts often involve serious emotions, which can alter the point of mediation.
No matter whether they sympathize with one party more or not, a mediator cannot offer a fair solution if they become biased. Their solutions should always be neutral.
A good mediator is trustworthy. Since you will be sharing intimate details and problems of your relationship with your spouse, you want someone you can trust. This information should be confidential and not discussed with anyone other than you and your spouse.
If you do not receive a feeling of trustworthiness from the mediator, it is better to keep looking. While one should not judge a person from their face value, a mediator’s personality should radiate strength, sincerity, and fairness.
A mediator should be able to adapt themselves to various environments and personalities. Mediation can occur at any location chosen by the client and between people of any personality.
No matter how clashing you and your spouse’s personalities might be, a good mediator will be able to transition between you two smoothly. They should be able to choose the right techniques according to the personality type they encounter.
Mediation is, more or less, a creative process. A mediator may come across two people with clashing personalities, and the things they want may be extremely contradictory to each other. The role of a mediator here is to be creative and figure out a solution that works best for both of them. They should have the ability to improvise solutions when the standard solutions do not work.